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Do you know where Marcel friggin' Proust is Some people stick to their guns when they say they don't care about looks—and bless their hearts.

Unfortunately, we're literally engineered to gravitate towards attractive individuals who smell like redwood trees and caramel.

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We live in a fluff-free era—people know what they want and aren't afraid to express their opinion in ALL CAPS, followed by a series of passive-aggressive emojis. In hopes of answering your burning questions, here are 13 dating apps ranked (lovingly and subjectively) on how likely you are to end up takin' old one-eye to the optometrist.

Dating is the same—we've reached critical mass, and that critical mass is critical on getting their mass touched. Anyway, with the act of dating living solely on a mobile platform, the dating app reigns supreme. Hey, gotta quench that thirst somehow—what's that famous Mother Teresa quote?

offers you the chance to date hot MILFS without ever having to leave your home! Signing up is totally free and you immediately get the chance to enjoy the full advantages of the site without those annoying features that are only for paying members that make you not enjoy the site to it's fullest.

, Tinder is the harbinger of today's hookup-fueled "dating apocalypse." But the truth of the matter is, hooking up isn't anything new (and may in fact be hardwired into our genetics).

At Online Booty Call we take a casual approach to dating online.

Dating should be fun, not serious, that's why Online Booty Call has millions of personals for singles who love to date and booty call.

It's simple; don't promise marriage just to get a date.

Join Online Booty Call today by creating a free profile and start finding what you really want.

And as for Tinder, sure, it can be used for swiftly finding a one-night stand, but there are If your life is too busy to squeeze in the time-consuming intricacies of a longer-term relationship, or you're just looking for a little low-stakes fun tonight, you need a quick, surefire way to find a quality fling.

Dance clubs and dive bars may have worked in the '90s, but now, even if you’re out, your phone is a much easier way to find someone to "watch Netflix and chill" with (especially someone you won’t regret tomorrow).

All you have to do is a search for singles in your area and start sending messages start getting replies immediately!

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