Growing up in the church, I thought I had a solid understanding of how my story would play out.
No matter how you choose to word it, being single was never in my plans.
Find out early if there are reasons that “making it work” will be fraught. Select a few of these questions rather than attempt to ask them all on the same first date! For example, if one person likes to take very long trips and the other person has a more standard two weeks vacation time. If asking this question leads to five solid minutes of them complaining you'll know the person sees the glass as half empty. Why: When you enter a relationship with someone you’re also entering a relationship with their friends. Why: If one of you doesn't like pets and the other has 3 dogs, that's likely to be a problem.
Also, if anything out of the ordinary has happened that might be affecting your date’s mood, it’s good to factor this in. Also, it’s nice to give your date an opportunity to answer a question that isn't directly about them.
Other times, guys find out I’m a Christian and automatically assume I’m uptight and judgmental.
The stereotypes get old.” Of course, the problems don’t disappear when Christians choose to date only other Christians.
We don't endorse missionary dating as the world does‹ moving frequently from one relationship to another without purpose or commitment.
However, we don't want to move forward with a mystical, fairytale or unrealistic expectation, which may cause frustration for both individuals.
Key goals of a first date are to (a) see if you have a connection, and (b) find out if you and your date have any major areas of incompatibility. Why: Does the person have strong feelings or are they more easygoing and with milder feelings.
We’re wired so that once we start to develop an emotional attachment this is hard to break away from. Why: Different vacation preferences or amounts of vacation time can be a major source of ongoing incompatibility. Why: This question helps establish if your date has a positive or negative attitude? Why: Helps you find out the person's preferences and also helps you establish if the person has any free time or if they're a workaholic.
Why: Are they very involved with their family of origin?